And though you fight to stay alive, your body starts to shiver. For no mere mortal can resist the evil of the Twitter

EtalkBen: Hey, help stroke my ego by reading about me here. [Tea Makers URL]

EtalkBen, If only we’d known that your time would be short on this earth. If only we could have known that we were in the midst of a Golden Age of fake Canadian celebrity tweets, perhaps we would have appreciated you more.

The media was intent on goading you, but I always understood you. You used your tweets to turn the mirror back on all of us, so that we could truly see ourselves for the first time. You broke down the barriers for all those that followed.

Now it’s all too late. Your account has been suspended and snatched from us way before its time.

We continue. Somehow.

petermansbridg: When are you going to give me back my Blu-ray of Bride Wars, @rickmercer?

petermansbridg is the Usher of the fake Canadian tweetosphere. Competent? Yes. Safe? Absolutely. Gentle? As a White-browed Tit. The author is, no doubt, a student of yours, EtalkBen. And in your absence he’s all we have left.

  • melissagrelo: What’s your best pickup line? One you’ve used or heard... E-mail us
  • petermansbridg: @melissagrelo Mine: “I deliver the news with integrity and respect for my viewers’ intelligence.” I suppose that wouldn’t work for you?
  • @melissagrelo: @petermansbridg That’s rude.
  • Danovac: @melissagrelo I’m beginning to think that’s not Peter Mansbridge.
  • MitchBurke: @melissagrelo That can’t be the real Peter Mansbridge. He’s been going around & insulting all news agencies that aren’t the CBC.
  • melissagrelo: @Danovac I called the real Mansbridge to see if he’s on Twitter and you are correct. It’s a fake twit.
  • neens29: @melissagrelo @petermansbridg That’s rude. WHOA! Totally uncalled for!
  • petermansbridg: @neens29 You seem to delight in Perez lampooning “celebrities” – why get your nose out of joint over this? #doublestandards #hypocrisy
  • neens29 @petermansbridg haha delight? because I repley to Perez?! #lostrespectforyou

There may be hope for him yet. Let’s keep an eye on this one.

DixonTam: @lisasj I have a story idea to pitch for next week. What’s the best way to submit it to CBC TV? Who is the assignment editor? Thx.

I believe she can be reached at That’s a dot, not an underscore.

Bigyburn: @lensauer Hi there. I’m a journalist with CBC News. I found you on Twitter and wanted to speak with you.

Well, I guess this goes both ways and the first time I saw journalists on twitter doing this I was taken aback. Now I could fill a whole blog with them if I was so inclined. A whole Tumblr. And aim for a book deal. Don’t steal my idea.

matthewi: If you know someone going to MJ memorial, @ me or @jembradshaw – we would like to interview them and/or capture their tweets live

Someone should tell Matthew Ingram that “tweets” is just a euphemism. They’re not really birds. You “capture” them by putting your hand down the tweethole, grabbing anything you can find, and then printing them in the newspaper.

cbcradio: Going on a road trip tomorrow. Any non-CBC podcasts or music you recommend for the drive?


kaleemux: Why has there been a still Grey Power auto-insurance ad on CBC Newsworld for the last 10 minutes while we hear audio from reporters & ads?

It’s kind of technical, kaleemux, but the gist of it is: you don’t drive like her, so why are you paying the same insurance premiums as her?

DebPDanS: CBC may want to ask Canadian Trucking Magazine why they feel the need to degrade women drivers?

Indeed they may! Then again, they might want to let the issue play itself out.

Anyways, there’s a Canadian Trucking magazine? Who says Canadian media is in trouble?

todmaffin: Jesus. Why did I buy a MacBook Pro 17″ two weeks before WWDC? Brain freeze. Related: Anyone want to buy a brand-new (as of 2 wks ago) MPB17?

The Futurist business, on the other hand, has seen better days.

BlockVeteran: Delivery guy just caught me watching Steven and Chris on CBC. Pause. My street credibility just plummeted.

As has the Internet Tough Guy racket.

heywriterboy: Wow. The hotel bar is a total sausage rest.

The Newfoundland Drunken Writer Mafia is also seems to be losing some of its glamour.

905CBC: A high-school prank gone terribly wrong. See it on CBC News at Six!

CBC News in the 905, however, is all systems go!

1 comment

  1. Anon
    Posted July 12, 2009 at 5:59 pm | #

    I missed these things. More please!

Write for us