Gayest show on television?

Elvis Stojko never looked straighter – in retrospect, anyway. New for ’09!Battle of the Blades is an elimination-style challenge that teams up Canada’s top figure skaters with this country’s most daring and versatile hockey stars to compete against one another each week in a glitzy pairs figure skating performance.” Wait – the figure skaters are girls, right?

Also greenlit: 18 to Life and Republic of Doyle (just those two), Ron James, and, hot on the heels of Canwest’s speling be, Canada’s Super Speller.

9 comments:

  1. Vigilante
    Posted April 26, 2009 at 3:14 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Nah. Girly don’t do it.

    We’re in an age where “Girly”, “Effeminate” and “Pussified” don’t mean shit.

    And Thank Fucking Dog! I didn’t think I’d ever live to see that happen. The only thing I have to complain about is the amount of tissues I’m going through. Fucking guys cryin’ all over the damned place. What the fuck is that all about? Fucking costing me money and the world trees, that’s what it’s all about. Dammit.

    What was I on about again?

    Oh yeah.

    Sparkly. That’s what I’d call it. Because no self-respecting gay wants to be associated with glitter.

    Can I get an Amen?

  2. Fake Ouimet
    Posted April 25, 2009 at 10:25 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    How ’bout “girly”?

  3. Anonymous
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 3:35 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    How can you assume how the show will be cast? Seriously, people. Wickenheiser is a name known in many homes – it’s not outlandish to assume that they may actually pair female power skaters with male figure skaters.

    And wow, calling figure skating ‘gay’. Welcome to the 20th century, boys!

  4. Fake Ouimet
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 12:37 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    You’re on to something there, Anonymoose at 12:34 (5678).

    I assume this is going to be some kind of battle of the sexes in Layfieldian wymmyn-friendly guise (or wymmyn-friendly guys). Tough, strapping hockey dudes confront the insurmountable obstacles of grace, tenderness, and flat-out effeminacy as girlish figure skaters teach them the ropes. Perfectly suits the standard liberal-feminist myth that men are defective women and could stand to have a few projecting edges sanded off.

    This doesn’t seem like a showcase of athletic ability, which everyone knows and acknowledges figure skaters already have. It seems to be an exercise, organized in the twin theatres of reality television and the skating rink, in soothing the savage b(r)east. Further cultural emasculation, you could say.

    All this is speculation, as I haven’t seen the show, which probably hasn’t even been shot yet.

    But what if they’d mixed it up a little? Wymmyn hockey players and male figure skaters? Or would that just end up looking like half the figure-skating events I’ve seen at the Gay Games?

  5. Anonymous
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 10:27 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Self-hatred’s a funny thing, innit?

  6. Anonymous
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 9:34 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    there are women hockey players. do they count?
    most of them kick ass.

  7. Fake Ouimet
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 9:30 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    None that I’ve fucked.

  8. Anonymous
    Posted April 22, 2009 at 8:23 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    I didn’t know this blog was run by homophobes.

  9. Allan
    Posted April 21, 2009 at 9:51 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    You’re not kidding are you.
    (Ballroom) Dancing With The Stars becomes, in Canada, (Figure) Skating With The Hockey Stars.
    Wow. Such is the CBC Think Tank.
    And those hockey players. We used to talk about guys like that in high school when they weren’t around.
    Coincidentally, we also, called them “daring and versatile”.


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