Up With Senior Managers!

Greetings!

Welcome back, wherever you were! And thank you for not deleting this email.

What a summer it’s been! I’ve spent much of it answering emails from our friends of Canadian broadcasting and traveling across the country as part of my Challenge Us! initiative. I’ve been spending time in the trenches with you folks. It’s been a very fruitful exercise. What became immediately apparent to me was that these trenches need a good vacuuming. In retrospect, cutting back on cleaning staff and instilling compost heaps every 20 metres may not have been the best idea. I am following up with a new Smell Us! initiative, the details of which you will be emailed shortly.

All of these programs, which you can read about on IO!, reinforce my beliefs that exclamation points not only improve morale, they wake up senior employees. Quite literally!

What also became apparent to me is that senior managers are generally held in low regard. This is a problem for all of us. It’s significance can not be understated. Many of you might be wondering why, after these people locked you out in 2005, they are still around. You might be asking how, with so much ill will, can we move forward in union negotiations. You might be asking when, if ever, real change might occur at senior levels.

The answer is right now, with my Up With Senior Managers! initiative. Clearly what is needed is a good, vigorous reshuffling of jobs and titles in senior positions. Effective immediately George Smith, formerly head of Inhumane Resources, will now be Senior Vice-President of Corporate Priorities and Implementation. The key word here is “implementation,” the root of which is “implement.” Which is another word for “tool.” From this day forward George Smith will be the official CBC Tool, a position he has held for many years in practice but which has never been formalized. Until now!

Other senior managers have been given new duties, some of which might seem dubious to you and might not have much to do with broadcasting. But believe me, they are very important! These people must not be fired. Just trust me on this one.

The entire team, formerly known as the “Senior Management Committee,” is being rebranded and will now be known as “Senior Executive Team,” or SET. It has a nice ring to it. Picture a “set” of Royal Doulton figurines, each one made of fine porcelain and whiter than the last, if that were possible.

We will also be hiring a new Vice-President of People and Culture. I’m not sure what this person will do, either, but it sounds very forward-thinking and engaging. It will be the first priority of the CBC Tool to find this person, and insure they stay as far away from people and culture as possible. Our search will begin with, but not be limited to, visible minorities.

I’m confident that with these changes in place, all anchored in people, programs and pushing forward, we can continue to coast into the future.

And with that, I sign off. Wheel of Fortune is on.

Cheers!

Hubert
Office of the President and CEO

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 4:05 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    The next round of layoffs will be very very soon

    and then there will be another lockout followed

    by draconian cuts from the Harper majority

    governments followed by more cuts, an investigation

    by the Auditor General, criminal charges, more cuts

    and privatization.

  2. Dont!call!me!shirley!
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 12:25 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Greetings!

    Surely you mean SET in concrete!

    Iprefer whatever the sarcoffigized Hans Solo in!

    Napolenn Solo, even!

    (lol the wordverification for this was texyvp)!

    !

  3. Anonymous
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 11:30 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Perhaps more funnier/jolie if you read the original Sept 15 memo from Hubert T. Not everyone is “inside.”

    “Friends” reposted the Englsh version :

    “Welcome back, changes to SET by Hubert T. Lacroix”

    http://www.friends.ca/News/Friends_News/archives/articles09150802.asp

    Anyone see if he is comme joli et vide in the version francaise?

    And can we, like in “Goldfinger” seal all the managers at the Remembrance day (Nov 11-13) CBC managers’ conference in cement after we pull out the floor from under them?

    And why can’t we slice the management down to one or two levels of less-hated and have the staff do most of the work on trust?

    It’s going to be a long Spring for the Guild.

  4. Kath. Arses
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 8:47 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Well met! Ouimet!

    Perfect!!1!!!

  5. Anonymous
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 7:29 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Funny because it’s true.

  6. Anonymous
    Posted September 19, 2008 at 7:18 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    “Tool” and “root” definitely apply in this case.

    Now please stop dicking around, Hubert, and get us more money.


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