Thirty Metre Zone

The forecast calls for a bun in the oven for this weather vixen. Who’s the father? Who cares? Just as long as she can keep rocking the body stocking and over-the-baby belt.

You go, girl!

Jeannie Lee is still dogged by rumours that she’s entirely constructed of wood. Her deadpan delivery of bizarre puns and unfunny oneliners doesn’t help much. What’s with the vaudeville act, Jeannie? Just give us the money news straight up.

We can take it!

Everyone’s favourite Claire Martin has finally had a makeover, ditching her “simple country gal” look for a more sophisticated “simple country gal gets her first big city haircut” look. Doesn’t the CBC have stylists?

TMZ asks… where are our tax dollars going, anyways?

A large vocabulary and the ability to use complex grammatical structures never goes out of style. Neither does a quality suit and tie. You’re still the king, Rex.

Long may you reign.


  1. rex rocks my socks
    Posted December 1, 2007 at 8:12 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    how dare you insensitive monsters insult rex murphy’s looks? don’t you know he has feelings just like kirstine layfield?

  2. Anonymous
    Posted November 30, 2007 at 9:07 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    lol those are great, squirrel! I love this blog. Everyone in the office loves it. It can be so sharp and funny and thought-provoking. Ya, and sometimes i don’t get it either, like robert, but the ride is always fun. Which lead me to this montage of Rex clips from 22 minutes

  3. Squirrel
    Posted November 30, 2007 at 7:25 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Anon at 9:47 – take a look at Rex circa 1970s and surely you’ll agree he’s gotten better with age.

    Here at 00:53 (with ever-present cigarette – some things never change)

    And here almost off the top

  4. Anonymous
    Posted November 30, 2007 at 6:37 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    Thirty metres radius and … yeah … that’s about it. Besides being as dull as Tim Horton’s why the hell do they still call it the “Canadian” Broadcasting Corporation anyway?

  5. Ouimet
    Posted November 30, 2007 at 6:24 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    This post is a takeoff on the gossip blog “TMZ” refers to the so-called thirty mile zone in Hollywood, within which production companies can shoot without paying per diems.

    Essentially it’s where all the action is in LA.

    In Canada this area is a lot smaller, more like 30 metres, probably around the Broadcasting Centre.

    I took a shot at imitating the writing style of that blog, where both the criticism and the praise is strangely superficial.

    So many people believe that we need a Canadian “star system,” to sell our shows and I think this is what it might look like. Completely hollow.

    And finally, I also like Jeannie, but I find her role a little baffling, so I wanted to write about it, to see what you thought. And 6:54 PM anon solved the mystery for me.

    So that’s the point, at least for me.

  6. Robert
    Posted November 29, 2007 at 11:37 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    I don’t get the point of this post, Ouimet.

    Who’s the father of Natasha’s baby? Her husband.

    I’m a fan of Jeannie’s, too. She’s clearly better than the talking head role she’s been given at Newsworld. Get her her own show – stat – and maybe she’ll have more reason to smile.

    Claire: Bad hair sometimes happens to good people. It’s TV… she’ll change it up again.

    All this to praise the tired Rex Murphy? Meh.

  7. Enik
    Posted November 29, 2007 at 10:43 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    He’s George Clooney compared to that open crypt they call CTV National News. Yeesh.

  8. Anonymous
    Posted November 29, 2007 at 7:47 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    oh dear.

    Rex is really great, and he does good work.

    But man, is he ever hard to look at.

  9. Anonymous
    Posted November 29, 2007 at 4:54 pm | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    The Newsworld bosses don’t want a serious business segment. Haven’t you seen the rest of the daytime shows? It’s all about quirky and fun. Jeannie isn’t going to bore viewers with the latest news on derivatives and hedge options. It’s about Starbucks opening a new outlet in China and the fun banter with Nancy that comes on the tail end of such a story!

  10. Anonymous
    Posted November 29, 2007 at 8:54 am | # | Reply to this masterpiece

    I like Jeannie Lee’s work.

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